When we first moved in everyone warned us about our weird, psycho neighbour. Rumour had it he’d hidden the bodies of five children in his cellar. Well, I like to form my own opinions about people so I spent some time getting to know him. And yes, okay, his breathing was a little loud and irregular and the way he swung his arms from his stooped body as he approached took some getting used to. His stare was certainly intense: one eye on you; one on the clouds. But really, come on, there was no way this poor unfortunate had killed five children. Two max, I’d say.