When Albert was small he hated using other people’s toilets. At his friend’s house he found it impossible to contain himself. So to avoid the embarrassment of asking where their toilet was he decided to have an emergency dump on the stairs. Four brown lumps on the fourth step.
Not to worry, Albert thought, examining his little mess: I have an excellent cover story.
“Their dog had an accident,” he explained eagerly to his mother when she came to pick him up, thinking of his own dog’s occasional indiscretions.
Strangely, though, Albert was never asked back. They didn’t have a dog.