Extreme Cold Calling (expanded)

My grandmother’s poor hearing made mincemeat of the obscene caller.

“You want to do what?” she shouted down the line.  “You want to stick your what where?  You’ve got a very big what?  Ready for me?  Well, I’ve not ordered anything.  Don’t you try delivering anything here.  I won’t pay for it, young man.  I simply won’t.”

We bit on our knuckles and cried with laughter.

“I’ve already got double-glazing if that’s what you’re after.  No, no, I’m not ready for you at all.  Whatever gave you that idea?  Who is your manager?  Fool!” she said, slamming down the phone. “Trying to sell me something but I still don’t know what,” she said, returning to her armchair.  “Why do young people always mumble these days?”

And all we could think of was the obscene caller’s escalating frustration.


10 thoughts on “Extreme Cold Calling (expanded)

      1. Oh the whole dialogue thing is annoying me a little more this time around. But the weight he gives to each word is something to behold, like they’re carved out of stone. Impossible to emulate if you have a sense of humor I suspect….(that’s my excuse anyhow….) Thanks again…I am enjoying the rediscovery….No Country for Old Men is probably my favourite…

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Haha! Most of us fall short of recreating McCarthy’s genius, probably because we can barely wrap or kind around what makes his writing so great. I think it’s the way he doesn’t waste a word. I have a copy of No Country For Old Men but have yet to read it! You just might’ve given me the nudge I need…

        on’t worry

        Liked by 1 person

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